These are the top mistakes people are making in their sex lives

April 17, 2019  22:15

Chopping vegetables, pooing, slicing up pineapples – there are lots of things we’re told we’re doing all wrong. Sex is not one of these things. As long as your sexual activity is consensual, healthy, and enjoyable, you go right ahead and do whatever you fancy.

But there’s always room for improvement, and, according to a new survey of 2,000 men and women, there are some mistakes that a lot of us are making.

Illicit Encounters quizzed a bunch of their users to see what they’d list as the top mistakes a partner could make in bed. Again, doing these things is not necessarily wrong, but they’re actions that may piss off a partner.

We say it all the time, but the best approach if you’re worried about your sexual relationship is honest, open communication.

According to the survey, men’s biggest sexual mistake is skipping foreplay, while women’s is failing to initiate sex.

Women's biggest sex mistakes, according to men

Fail to initiate sex
Always wanting sex in the dark
Faking an orgasm
Talking too much
Never asking for anything new
Mentioning what a previous lover did in bed
Over-thinking sex
Being too timid
Believing he is always up for sex
Worrying too much about how they look

Men's biggest sex mistakes, according to women

Skipping on foreplay and rushing straight into full sex
Having an orgasm first
Being clumsy
Talking dirty in a crude way
Lack of communication/intimacy after sex
Fall asleep as soon as they have finished
Commenting on women’s body shape
Assume you know what she wants
Rigidly stick to your plan and ignoring her body language
Keep it completely physical with no emotional connection

That these are the top two make sense – just 18% of women say they orgasm from penetration alone, so it’s wise to engage in foreplay and other non-penetrative stuff if you’re bothered about a woman’s sexual pleasure.

The mismatch in initiating sex is a common cause of tension, making the one who initiates more feel rejected. Thankfully, both of these issues are easily remedied. Foreplay can be made a priority, while a reluctance to initiate sex is something that should be discussed honestly and openly.

Sammi Cole, sex and relationship expert at Lovehoney, told Metro.co.uk: ‘There are tons of reasons that someone might not be as interested in sex as another person, and quite often, it’s nothing to do with the person that they are having sex with.

‘External stress, medication, loss of confidence, changes in routine, health issues, past trauma, and age are just some of the factors that can affect our sex drives, so before you rush to, “they clearly don’t want me any more”, take the time to talk things through in a calm and non-accusatory way.

Source: Metro

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